natali3 :D

2011-03-13T06:25:00.001-07:00

For him, i've cried.
With him, i've lived.

Hear me cry

2011-03-12T07:01:00.000-08:00

Can you blame me for crying?
Can you blame me for showing tantrums?
i hope you can.
Show me why i'm being a brat.
Show me why i'm crying over the slightest things.
I hope i can cry in your arms.
I don't know what's wrong with me.

SNUGGLE

2011-02-06T09:36:00.000-08:00

HI!!!! Start off my post introducing you to a site!
www.mylittlebow.com
I've always been wanting to get a necklace like that above, except that it reads my name "natalie", with a heart shape behind and a silver/pink diamond on the "i". LOL
still contemplating whether i should get it.
I will get it ^.^ SOON.

So i'll blog a little bout my CNY day 1. (:
Out with family to esplanade area. Where every year there's Chinese New year events! (:
We also went to Marina Bay Sands to walk around (: Actually, we followed the crowd and landed up there LOL.

Looking at this picture, i finally do agree with my friends that my mother looks fierce. She got the glum look. Age taking effect? :X But she's not that bad lah~ ;D

Bro clad in red and white and my domo bag(given by jazz two years back?)!!!

A lil too patriotic? Given we were on the floating platform.

Been ages since i've seen a funfair! LIKE OMGxzxzxzxz! EXCITE!

Oh crap it. I look like a china doll. Don't brood it in.

TODAY

Notice my title header "SNUGGLE"?

I did a lot of snuggling and sleeping today! (:

Had a long night and didn't catch sleep at all last night cos was at friend's house all night.

And today! I went to my bf's house to bai nian.

Bf went to sleep and didn't pick up my calls while i waited for him for 1 hour! *HATES*

Was grumpy cos i didn't get sleep, and was particularly angry at bf.

For a while that is :X

I'm a nice gf! (:

Both of us didn't catch sleep the previous night and we were dead beat?

So, i slept on his bed and he slept on the mattress on the floor! WEEEEE

Love his blankeeeeeeeeeeeee!

Did my infotech proj. Quite fun quite fun. Love to do screenshots! :D

Shall i screen shot a slide of my ppt for eu?? :D

Ok. EPIC UGLY. FAYULLLL!

hahahah! End my blog post here!

Back to school guys! Time to burn off all my added kilos and kill off all my newly formed pimples.

BLACKSWAN

2011-02-04T11:23:00.000-08:00

yoohoo once againxzxz! I've been blogging often right? :)

How's yr day everybodeh?! :D

mine's great!

met up with lingmei for movie in the morning. We watched All Well Ends Well.

Or i think its called that.

Not bad.

But rate it 2/5. Kindda like a movie that doesn't have much capturing moments.

Its good if you just wanna pass your time on a boring CNy day2 morning :X

Met up with my boyy at NEX and i forced him to watch BlackSwan with me lolol.

He wanted to watch The Green Hornet. :x

But i really really wanted BlackSwan, so no way he's not gonna give in >:I

HAHAHA!

I didn't bring my camera out so no pictures :/

chilled at some isolated corner at NEX while waiting for movie to start.

Seriously, NEX have a lot of alleys/ corners that are great for sitting and chilling.

I got my fav spot~ :D

i'll be mad if i share it with you guys right? Than it'll not be quiet anymore~

Movie was ummmmmm... INTENSE. Or traumatising for weak-hearted people like me :/

Hmm.. the movie was about this ballet dancer who is very eager to be the lead role of "Swan lake", where she has to dance two characters out : the white swan and the black swan.

Both swans are said to be twins falling for the same person, the black eventually wins?

So, this dancer was very intrigued into her character in the dance, and she is very sensitive of people stealing her role. So she spiraled into a psychological trauma, getting illusions etc.

And she touched herself! :X ok, now a bit of out point. But not thrilled watching this show that may somewhat turn my bf on? But nope he didn't. I think~

M18 movie after all :I

Go watch it !

Not bad! likea 3.75/5!

HAHA.

Bf sent me home cos he knew weak-hearted me is scared of taking the lift alone this late at night after watching an intense ( i categorize the movie under horror genre- not the psychological genre) movie.

Anyway, i was elated! And somewhat touched :'D

And he piggybacked me!

AWWWW

Love him!

Gotta sleep now!

Shall update about my CNY day 1 post soon!

Stay tune!!!! <3

COMMITMENTS

2011-02-02T11:12:00.000-08:00

Hello, i'm back! It's 2.40am, so its theoretically the first day of the Chinese New Yearr!
I'm not enjoying my CNY as much as many others do... It's kinda boring if you have a small family, where CNY reunion dinner is almost the same as any other family dinners.
BUT! I'm enjoying my holidays! [:

HMM...
Should i quote a sweet sentence my bf said to me? :>
& so i was too bored at home so i decided to switch on the tv and watch channel 8 countdown to CNY show, and there's always like this shifu speaking bout the luck of the various zodiacs right, and happened that this year, rooster will not be doing well on the whole in terms of work, health and relationship. : < yes, i'm a chicken.
Not that i believe in horoscopes/zodiac, but it is quite demoralising to hear that ok! Problems problems in all areas. GOD BLESS ME.
& so i told this to my bf... and this is what he said: " I don't believe in any horoscope or zodiac or the stars, i just believe in you and I."
SWEET right~ HAHAHHA.
OK, i'm being boastful that i have an awesome boyfriend. YELPS.:D

I still remember there's a period where i wasn't particularly interested in a relationship. I was the NO-means-NO (to a r/s) type. I remember the phobia of being in a relationship.
Commitment is the key to a successful relationship. Both parties must commit. It gets challenging when your life gets stressed up with work, school and you have no time to stuff daily calls or even a date per week. I on the other hand, at the point of time, wasn't ready for this, i had no intention to put my work, school aside to focus in a r/s. But now i'm enlightened, because you don't have to put those aside, you just have to balance it out and it'll work out (:
& then comes the feeling of longing-ness if you don't see your partner for days or even just a day. : < I still don't like the feeling, but i'll accept that i feel this way bcos he is special to me ^^
Slowly, insecurities set in. HEY, not that i don't have trust in him ok! Just that i'm a girl, and girls tend to think to much. Like "will he get bored of me?" ; "is he drinking with a girl beside him now" etc. HAHHAHA this part i'll agree it is not a healthy thinking. I won't think too much la. I AM JUST SAYING~

But i think my bf changed all that i used to think of a relationship.
So to those who are still afraid to get into a relationship, fret not okay?
Open up and don't close your door, and i'm sure the right one would come by.
Just be yourself and he'll love you for who you are.

Thumbs up! ^.^

END OF IS COMMIS PROJ!

2011-02-01T20:12:00.000-08:00

YEAH! duper happy cos my major final project for IS commis is finally over. Been spending days and nights rushing the slides (two days to be exact) and now is finally overrrrr~ Who cares i get grade C, just gotta buck up for my other subjectss! HEES. Seriously, i really think too much smsing, blogging with weird languages( not that i do this often) has cause my English standards to plummet. Or at least my speaking skills. I didn't usually stammer and stutter as much as i do now as compared to secondary school! * is this sentence broken too?*

Okkk just wishing my time would fly now. :/ I'm blogging this post sitting at a quiet corner in the school lib, waiting for stupid yoshi poon to finish his IS ends at 1pm. 1 hour 2 minutes more to go! : > And i knew the plan to visit island creamery for delectable ice cream would somehow be cancelled, i got foresight ok! *prouds* HAHAHA. So i'm waiting for him to accompany him to causeway point to like buy stuffs? Great way to spend my time on Chinese New Year's Eve *tinge of sarcasm*

AND YEAP! It's CNY eve today! * lights firecrackers* Enjoy your reunion dinner people! Or at least your holiday! Finally right~ A whole year of waiting for the arrival of the longest holiday in Singapore-- the Chinese New Year break. HEEHEE! Collect your angpows ok! I'm collecting mine and saving up for shopping and holiday abroad! HAHAHA. Though think after shopping i'll be left with no extra cash to save up for my desired holiday already. :C

Oh, my boy's sick. Oh wait, he's coming to pei me now. Update later. WEE :D

MONSOON'S OVERRRRR

2011-01-31T04:34:00.000-08:00

HELLO.
Long time no see my blog!
Theee MONSOON is finally overrrr! It's been pouring since saturday afternoon, and it finally stopped today! *INSERTS RAINBOW HERE*
Not that i don't like the rain, it's really nice if i'm at home all day in this rainy weather, but if i'm out and about and stepping on puddles of rainwater, i really don't like it!!> : [
HEEHEE but one should try sharing an umbrella with his/her love one! <3 TEE HEE! :3

Today is the last day of the month of jan! And Chinese New Year is round the corner, just 3 days away!
Happy Chinese New Year to those who are celebrating, and Happy hoildays to those who are not! : ]
Than again, i love CNY for its long holiday break! But i don't really like because almost all the shops would be closed and the whole of Singapore would be stagnant :C But visiting would nevertheless be fun! :D
This Chinese New Year, i want spend it with my family and bf! Hahaha!

I have nothing much to blog about, except that i'm always busy doing IS project.
Just wrapped up the Cultural Quotient presentation and here comes the final project. -.-
but! It'll be done and over with this wed! :D
^.^

Haha! I'll be back doing my project soon.
Meanwhile! Shall i share with eu a photo?? :D

heehee! pardon for us not being photogenic!
but but i love my bf!:D

cya soon!

NOM NOM NOM!

2011-01-04T07:30:00.000-08:00

hi PEEPS! :D
how's life for you? (:
mine's been fine! Merry Happy Happy! :D
LOVE my bf so muchie! :D

School today was fine.
Great news, i passed ALL my common test papers with OK results :D
AMAZED AND HAPPY!
i'm so happy i can only use the word HAPPY to describe everything lolol!
:X

Sort of webcamed with josie, laughing mad crazy! cos the effects very funny OMG lol.
present to eu a very cute pic okie!

i know i know. i'm AWED by my cute triplet teeth too! LOL

went to bf's home at serangoon after school.
NERVOUS.
he's nephew very cute! but i think he bear a grudge on me because i stole his "uncle"? :X
he stared at me and make little growling noise. feel like pinching his cheeks but he pinched mine instead. :/
bf's mum was very nice!
Quite unlike mine 'cos mine is naggy and kpo. :X
ATE dinner there too!

bf sent me to maisy's grandpa funeral, which i was suppose to be there wayyy earlier :X
they were playing majong.
left there and cabbed home.
thanks eric for the lift home ^.^

I'm gonna tug in bed now.
8am class tmr lolol!
^.^
nights ppl!

2010-12-28T00:42:00.001-08:00

So enlighten to hear eu have found someone in your life which means a lot to you.
Go for it! (:

HEYHEYHEY!

2010-12-28T00:38:00.000-08:00

Yo wad'sup! :)
i love my blogskin!
doing this to motivate me to blog more, but i'm getting lazier and lazier.
Tmr would be my class bbq, i'll try to update my post hopefully with some pics.
ciao!

2010-11-18T08:15:00.000-08:00

i feel its time for me to revive my blog :)
im actually blogging when i actually havent completed my biostats homework. but seeing numbers is really killing me .-. buaytahan! lucky i never took up business as my course x:
sad to say, months of not writing and speaking proper English had caused my english to worsen, therefore maybe re-blogging may hep me to refine my english a little, not to say had good english to start with.
so all the best to me! :)
School's starting at 9am on-the-dot tomorrow, so i have to tug in early :)
Sickening school abolished the 15 minutes grace period rule, and marking everyone late/ absent even if it is just a minute over the starting time. -.- coping quite ok so farrrrrr, if eu consider 30$ a week donated to cabbing is really ok :X
work is really tiring. i have work after school tmr :[
and i did give my schedule as 7-11pm, but they put me 5-11pm. really cmi lorr, bcos my nice school ends at 4pm. -.-
continue tmr hopefullyyyyyy :D
nights & sweet dreams!

2010-08-15T11:43:00.000-07:00

am happy with life (:
though i'm a person with full of flaws, and easily dishearted,
i'm contented with many experience and friends that pulled me through (:

gonna meet up with nancy, mel and JIALING soon D:
miss them extremeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! D:

2010-08-10T10:53:00.001-07:00

fuck.
i wish i can grow long hair without it falling every minute.
GRR/

2010-08-03T09:30:00.001-07:00

frustrated.
who the hell has to go back to sec school for celebration on national day itself??????? LOL.
it makes no sense. AT ALL.

2010-08-01T09:26:00.001-07:00

i'll wake up. and see eu there (:

2010-07-31T07:58:00.000-07:00

habitually, i would pick up my phone, create a new message, but gives up after trying to fit in words to start off the message. eventually, it'll be in my drafts. & now as i delete all the nonsense in my phone, i notice that in every draft, i typed "hope eu're doing fine"... Are eu doing fine, my friend?
yeahh i suck being a friend. suck even leading my own life.
i find that i had taken the wrong path after trekking for a long distance. shall i make a Uturn? Or would i then be a no-lifer?
having a palpable feeling that maybe changing course would be a better idea. or is it not?
done off all that crying, maybe i should make a decision.
i wont be better off in this course that i show no particular interest in, would i?
*bangs head onto wall* what's best for me?

soccer has ended with its final lesson ystd. imma SAD! cos it is veryyyy fun! great tym playing a mixed match at a great big field with my S&W matesss! (:
& fun great tym shopping aft that (:

2010-07-25T10:49:00.000-07:00

heeeeeeee! blogging again :D
no idea wad to blog, nth particularly interesting to share :X
it's a blabber dayyyy! :D
school is starting tmr again. but! i'm starting to love school!
great friends, great flexi tymmm!
soccer competition (S&W) was much better than i had anticipated.
not gore at all, instead had maxi fun!

work today was boring! and my fav shoe tore! the sole came off. .-. dangdangdang.
so bought new pair of shoessssss :l no worries, bugis i'll be visiting eu soon!
CS-ed and L4D2 ystd midnite with fellow peeps! :D
fun and weeeeeeeee-icked. :)

yawn. living my life just as naturally as how my life wanns to live me.
it gets tiring after a while, when eu suddenly stop and realise have eu been enjoying at all.
so much if i had wanted to say yes, so much reason there is to rebut against it.

just wanna know, how have eu been, my friend?
i wished i had sought the extensive courage to reply eu, but maybe just ignoring and letting eu go is for best.
after all, i make your life miserable,with countless worries and irritation.
idw it to happen again and forge a bad and grudging ending.
to it all, a stop has to be a permanent one, only to improve the situation.
think of me as a cigarette stick and eu as a smoker.
deemed to quit smoking? stick to it. for it'll save your life, making each of your step a healthier and more meaningful one.
good luck on your future endeavors my friend. memories greatly remembered.

off to sleeeeeeeeeep!

2010-06-21T08:48:00.000-07:00

maybe its the old flame that burns longer... (:

fed up with mbio project. driving me insane extreme!
gahh, wish me luck!

met up with JASLENE, rachel, xiaohuan, LINGMEI and NANCY today!
adore max! :)
movied with lm, jas and rachel.
karate kid. AWESOME.
the lead actor/boy, jayden smith, is will smith's son! acting just is in their genes man! :D
like super talented!!!!! :X and can tell he trained extreme hard for the movie!

2010-06-20T06:20:00.000-07:00

LOL.
glad i've passed my mbio!
quite unexpected cos i wrote thrash literally. and studied for it at the very weeee last minute.
haha, but i tink i LITERALLY hit borderline mark x:
geez, gonna go "counseling" soon X:
oh, i'm thrashed.
my project also never do.
if it's suppose to be a holiday project, why give datelines during the holiday itself?
fuck. esp when i gave the link and dunno how to upload, and it just disappeared in the spreadsheet, machiam like i never do like that. EEEEEEEEEEE.

hahhaha! worked today! finally as setter! :D happy max! didn't touch spoons and FORKS for so long! :D
FORK! hahahaha! maemae( sir billy-the-goat) keep fork ystd :X like so random only :3
so muahahhaha! i didn't really jam on fathers' day :D it was okayyyy.
RIZAL is my great partnerrr :D

oh, natalie is a silly girl! hhaha. great lies, spot on nightmare-came-true.
but <3 the auntie, she last tym very mean to me, but she quite nice now :)
haha, yes, i cannot be his aiai cos he has a wife and a soon-to-be newborn!
like how LOL only, wifeeeeeeeeeeee leaaa! not girlfriend! :X cheated for sooo long x:
hahhaha! seeee peepos, guys are jerks! certified!
HAHA. i'm living in a joke ): but not to worry,my feelings faded anw, it's easy to get over it (:
SAD..................................................................... NOT! :D

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWW! today is yeap hong da's last day! D:
he going tekong +botak sooon ;D
will miss him max. after all he was one of the few that treat me very nicely ever since i started working there (:
we must must catch up! :)

today's father's dayyy! but not very fantastic lea. no special discount, deco, food menu etc, like so sian only! :X

JONJON! he arrived at sg ystd!
:D <3 extreme happy! but like no tym to meet up.
i miss him so!

2010-06-14T12:32:00.000-07:00

fucking tired quarreling over the same reasons.
i thought eu gotten over it?

my on-off boyfriend is returning to sg! :D
jonathan lee jian rong! :D i miss eu extremelyyyyy :D
let's go out go out go out!!!!!!!!! :D
excite! :D
6 months without eu i cant take it ahh!
no one there to cheer me up when i turn emo!
no flowers, no sushi anymoreee D:
come back quick! lots of things to bombard to eu!
be there at airport to pick eu up ;D

2010-06-13T13:27:00.000-07:00

i still feel like writing :P
nobodaaay's reading this blog anywayyyyy :D
so gonna thrash it with my nonsense.
like how i feel like saying FA-THA-WAYYYYYYYYYY now x:
very random.

hahah! its really near sunrise yet i have no intention of sleeping!! D:
BAD HABIT!
like whatttt's keeping me awakeeeeeeeeeeeee.
nvm, use this tym to thinkkkkkk of my wonderfool life.
like in a few months tym~~~~ i'll be 18!:D (15months to be exact)
shall i start on my 18yearold to do checklist? :D
seems like a fantasticaaaa idea :D
1) i wannna get my butterfly tattoo~ heckcare if its outya fashion, i still wannnnn!
fluttering black white butterfly, chio! :D
2) go to a club and have a night's out! >< must tryyyyy~
3) duhhh! my bike license with a new bikeee. OR a car license with a 2nd hand old car x:
choose one!
4) get a boyfriend! refer to checklist belowwwwww :X
5)vacation anyone? :X
6) ^.^ i'm lost of wonderfool ideas! got any? x: i wannna be an air hostress on contract for 2 fucking amazing years x: no shytbull airways x:
7) please dont take me seriously, cos its nonsenses derived from my nonsensical brain at this hour (:

2010-06-13T13:07:00.000-07:00

<3 X!
it seems things had changed. just this had not.
tsk!
i L humorous guys
L charming guys! (charming need not be handsome)
H emo guys (like when eu stop talking to him for 30 minutes, he spam eu msg say eu are angry with him and blahblah)
L a guy that sees me and instantly brighten up his day x:
maybe have a favor on guys that can sing well~

haha! i'm a bit maaaaaaaaaaaaaaad.
blogging at 4am in the morning. blogging nonsense.
but its true, if eu ask me what i'm looking for in my guy.
i present to eu my checklist ;D

2010-06-12T12:23:00.000-07:00

i'm sorry we're never going to start out.
i can't take the way he thinks bout this, can't bring it across to leave it behind and start another.
i'm sorry, lucas...

2010-06-12T12:17:00.000-07:00

i'm soooo glad we are ok (:
talking like we used to.
i'm lucky i had a bestfriend like eu.
(: i hope we can get better everyday, void of disagreements.
cos in our situation, there's rarely misunderstandings, just disagreements x:
<3weiler!

today went shopping.
turned out fine, end out disastrous.
not gonna elaborate.
pics up soon, if i rmb.

i've tried to make it go away
endless times, lie to myself repeatedly, thinking it'll help out.
LIES.DESPICABLE TRUTH.
i still am in love with eu.
i've tried to plant my feelings into another, impossible it seems.
it seems eu know my strategy and completely sweep me off.
怎么办，我心裂成两半。。
也好，这样子反而好。

2010-06-06T09:07:00.000-07:00

i'm blogging.
this is our xxx times quarreling.
about stuffs i never really understand.
eu cannot just judge ppl when eu dont even know them.
eu cannot assume my life is always revolving round them.
eu cannot think eu know everything about me.
it sucks.
i did wrong too. i know.
this is fucking not working out right anymore.
let me rest. maybe. we'll come back one day...

today worked.
LOL to think have exam tmr. havent started a shyt yet still working. -.-
nvm! (: i can do it!
i'm soooooo angry at myself.
today he finally worked. after 14days without seeing him.
i know where he went. i know who he was with. yet i cant help but smile everytime he's here.
he's changed. but i dont care. just a day of seeing him and its fine.
i missed him max. just standing next to him and seeing the his wrinkles crease (hees) as he smiles, i'm contented (:
i know this cant continue. but my heart tells me its fine.
i shouldnt wait.
but i want to wait.
its a joke right from the start.
its still a joke.
but if only one day, i can say, i'm standing by him....
XIONG <3

LOL. i'm fucking cheesy.
STOP IT! >< study nowwwwwwwwww :D

2010-05-30T04:47:00.000-07:00

it has been proved over tym that i'm just another typical girl out there, making old typical mistakes.
my heart is not healing.
why!
如果当初知道这是不可能，为什么要对我这么好呢？
我想念从前，您对我的温柔和关怀，久而久之，我已习惯也期望您在的时候了。
你逗我开心，一旦看着你对我单纯的微笑，仿佛忘记所有的不欢乐，也不仅戴上了一丝的笑容。
我好怀念。。。
为何唱歌的这么好听！为何叫我爱爱？为何问我号码？为何当初叫我一定要等你？为何用你的吻把我锁住？为何把我的心夺走，又把它狠狠的扔掉？
为何不要唐白的说您有女朋友了？
我不了解您的心意，不了解你的目的。。
可是我知道我爱你的好，我也愿意爱您的坏，我已沉迷了。甚至有多么害怕您会安定下来。
我是大傻瓜，没有比你好很多。
我不该再等下去了。我会试着放手。。

爱你的我（：

2010-05-28T23:34:00.001-07:00

2010-05-25T10:17:00.001-07:00

i need eu to stand by me.
for i am scared of grasping my breath tym and again, being isolated and away from the light.
i need eu here

2010-05-25T09:56:00.000-07:00

stupid me.
i cant help but to miss eu.
i still like eu very much, i really do.
i wish someone would slap me across the face and shout to wake me up.

had a sucky day today.
i hate ppl who are insensitive and thinks they know it all.
get a life.

my MANGO bag is awesomeeee! :D

2010-05-23T10:18:00.000-07:00

fucking hate my life.
fucking love my fucking life too.
i'm falling, yet i love to fall and be grabbed in mid air.
falling out of love, yet knowing there's always pillar of support nearby.

gonna thrash my chem, physio and mbio assignments and quizzes.
might as well just quit on it.
like i have no interest in them at all.

continue tmr... nights!

2010-05-20T09:40:00.000-07:00

i'm back to blog. <;
maybe starting a blog may make me reason out some things in life.
everything's clouding around me, and its tym to find the courage to see things the way they are and step out of the circle.i guess :]

it happens in life. Distancing relationship, inadequate understanding. It's tough not to let go. Then again, it's gruelling to let go, everything will be wasted, right from the start. It's a pity that in a life cycle, one loses more than gaining. Yet, i'm not ready. To pretend it hadn't exist at all in my life. But, it takes two hands to clap. If the party wants to let go, or NEEDS to let go, you can't chain him by the neck and say STAY WITH ME.
You try to make him understand that you need him badly, but the limit cannot be exceeded if you grew tired of TRYING.
i remember someone saying. the best way to stop something from staling, is to preserve it.
:) boy, i'll let you snooze a while, leave you alone, than wake up and find me kay?^.^
you'll be my best friend for-ever-lasting :)

i feel insane! he wont be reading this! HAHAHA!

it's true. TRUTH HURTS.
However i want it to happen badly, however sweet the story seems to be unfolding, it always ends with a cold sharp knife piercing through your heart, waking you up.
It's a sweet dream, only to become a horrible nightmare.
我知道这是如此的不可能，我期望着，我希望我们有成果。。
你不停给我关怀，让我误导你一向来的心意，傻傻地喜欢上你了。
我放不下，你问我舍得吗，我不敢开口，心想：你舍得吗？

混乱。我领悟到，也许，我醒不过来了。。
你真正心思是什么，我多么想要了解。

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